Stan De Lone's Blog
SPECIAL K & 1 EYED JACK
It was London 1960 cold war and espionage
3 Russian spies had escaped from prison and they were now at large
Donald Hooper and John Blythe had worked for MI5
And Ted Hicks for MI6 but they were undercover Russian spies
Passing top secret information back to the KGB
As a result many British spies would disappear mysteriously
These 3 were sentenced to 40 years each but 2 years on they would escape
By killing 4 prison guards and scaling the fence in a bloody brutal prison break
Within hours of breaking out they’d broke into Whitehall and stole top secret plans
National security would be threatened if seized by Russian hands
The KGB had trained these 3 in many different ways to kill
While they were free the M.O.D. would not rest until
They were back in prison or dead so this called for the best
British secret service agent who was leagues above the rest
He was fluent in more than 50 languages and had a dozen P.H.D.’s
He could run a hundred yards in 10 seconds flat and a 4 minute mile on his knees
He was trained in every martial art known to man and even ones that weren’t
He could walk through fire covered in petrol and still not get burnt
He could swim across the channel underwater without a snorkel just holding his breath
He’d been shot 50 times blown up with bombs and still he cheated death
He could out run out jump out fuck out fight any man in the world
And he once beat a gorilla in an arm wrestle after shagging a dozen girls
His name was Jack King but his secret service name was Special K
He could do anything he could play any game or find a needle in a stack of hay
So in a penthouse apartment in Mayfair Special K was entertaining in bed
With 3 gorgeous girls who were former Miss World’s and all of them were giving him head
When the telephone rang it was the M.O.D. “Special K 3 spies have broke free”
“I’ll come as quick as I can. Sorry girls my country needs me”
Exactly 2 minutes later at Whitehall Special K then arrived
With lipstick on his face his shirt unbuttoned and his penis hanging out of his flies
“Special K put your weapon away” said the British secret service top bloke
With the airports sealed and the roads closed off the 3 spies were thought hiding in the smoke
Then on a Police boat on the river Thames a Copper saw a yacht moored by a quay
With 3 men on deck and the Copper did suspect these men acted suspiciously
So the river Policemen shined a light on them to recognise the face of John Blythe
He got on the radio and called in to give the exact location of the spies
But John Blythe took the coppers by surprise and karate chopped them both in the throat
Within minutes Special K had arrived and found 2 dead coppers on a boat
A mile away down the river Thames was the yacht with the Russian spies
But Special K had spotted them with his super human telescopic eyes
He took to the water like a dolphin and quickly made his way down stream
He swam up close 10 yards from the boat underwater so he couldn’t be seen
But Special K got a nasty surprise something got hold of his leg
It was a great white shark in the River Thames so he punched the bugger hard in the head
The shark swam off in a hurry but now he’d get another shock
When an Anaconda 30 foot long would now get him in a headlock
A wrestling match would now take place on the bottom of the river bed
But he wouldn’t submit and he loosened it’s grip and he killed the Anaconda dead
And now the yacht with the Russia spies had made it to the Thames Estuary
But special K wouldn’t let it get away and he caught it entering the north sea
He swam up close to the boat underwater so he couldn’t be seen
But beneath the waves he heard the sound of a machine it was a Russian submarine
Now the Russian sub would rise above the surface and sit on the sea
And the spies on the boat were now very close to passing secrets to the KGB
Then John Blythe saw something in the water and went to take a closer look
But the Russian spy got a nasty surprise when Special K hit him with a right hook
Special K flew out of the water and landed on the deck of the boat
And he hit John Blythe and Donald Hooper with a karate chop each to the throat
Ted Hicks now jumped on the u-boat and the sub prepared to dive
But Special K couldn’t let them get away and he climbed on board for the ride
Ted Hicks was in the sub and Special K was outside as it dived beneath the surface of the sea
And if the KGB got the top secret plans England would not be free
As the sub sunk below the ocean depth Special K was holding his breath
He didn’t give a damn for here was a man who did not believe in death
He swam to the submarines hatch and ripped it open with his bare hands
The water flooded in and in he would swim to retrieve the top secret plans
The Russian sailors and the spy Ted Hicks all grappled with Special K
But he beat them up with karate chops and kung fu kicks and swam out of the sub and away
Special K had saved the day he’d killed 3 Russian spies and sank a submarine
He swam to the shore then ran to Whitehall then to Buckingham Palace to meet with the Queen
“Hip hip hooray for Special K you’ve saved me and my country”
“I think you’re absolutely fab would you like to stay for tea?”
“Phillip’s cooking he does a mean kebab oh please tell me you’ll stay”
“I’m sorry Lizzy but I’m a bit busy perhaps some other day”
“She must be very special who is this lucky girl?”
“I can’t remember her name but she’s just been crowned Miss World”
With that Special K was away to a nightclub in the West End
To meet the newly crowned Miss World her twin sister and her best friend
And the 4 of them would then go back to his penthouse pad
Special K was A.K.A. Jack the lucky lad
© Dean Cooper Elston
Wednesday 22nd October 2008 - Friday 20th March 2009
ONE EYED JACK
It was 1723 in the Caribbean sea
In history known as the golden age of piracy
Where many ships were looted some were even sank
And pirates just for kicks made captive sailors walk the plank
And Blackbeard was no more for this legendary outlaw
Had met his death in battle on foreign shore 5 years before
But in little than a year a one eyed buccaneer
Had plundered ships and filled the Caribbean sea with fear
Just the mention of his name would make a hardened sailor scared
Not since the days of Blackbeard had a pirate been so feared
Across one eye he wore a patch where once stabbed with a knife
Known as one eyed Jack he had no value for life
A devil of a man who wore a hook upon his hand
He led a murderous band of buccaneers outlaws in every land
On foreign shores on golden sand there was a price upon each head
The British Royal navy would not rest until these men were dead
One eyed Jack Wild had had a very perturbed life
A disturbed only child he’d self harm with a knife
His disciplinarian drunken Father would often beat his Mum
And violently he’d use his fists on his frightened son
So when his Mother died Jack then ran away to sea
On HMS Hunter but he’d hate authority
So he formed a mutiny against the captain of the ship
And the loyalty of the crew was a 50 50 split
In the battle that commenced a loyal sailor with a sword
Was to severe Jack’s hand it then fell off the blood then poured
The ships Captain Crane was then to stab him in the eye
But this was not enough for one eyed Jack refused to die
Now insane with pain one eyed Jack would take revenge
Captain Crane would now be slain and meet a gruesome end
Sailors loyal to the flag were killed and thrown to sea
The rest joined one eyed Jack and lived a life of piracy
These mutineers turned buccaneers attacked a ship at will
The women on board they’d rape the men on board they’d kill
The blue seas of the Caribbean were often tainted red
And washed up on the golden shores were many a severed head
And now 6 British navy ships were sent to look for Jack
With strict orders from the Admiralty that they shall not come back
Without his severed head or the proof that he was dead
And the ex HMS Hunter sunk to the seabed
So in the Caribbean sea the Hunter was now the hunted
It was sighted by the navy as a violent storm erupted
The blues skies of the Caribbean were filled with clouds of black
The pirates led by one eyed Jack were now under attack
The sound of canons roared as lightning flashed across the sky
Sailors were thrown overboard by waves a mile high
Many were to die as the canon fire raged
The Hunter was surrounded no escape could be made
One eyed Jack stood fearless with a maniacal grin
As the British navy sailors climbed on board to tackle him
Each sailor drew his sword knowing Jack refused to die
Jack would now attack a look of evil in his eye
He wouldn’t come alive they’d have to kill him dead
A very wealthy prize would be Jack’s severed head
In the battle that commenced many sailors met their death
Of all the pirates on the Hunter only Jack was left
Then from the sky a bolt of lightning struck the Hunter’s deck
Fire engulfed the masts of this soon to be shipwreck
With the Hunter sinking fast the sailors now abandoned ship
But Jack stood to the last and now beneath the waves he’d slip
Of the 6 Royal navy ships only 2 came home
The other 4 sank to the sea floor in that violent storm
And the sailors that survived on the 2 ships that came back
All now testified to the death of 1 eyed Jack
And how they watched the Hunter sink beneath the waves of the sea
But now the Admiralty would face another mystery
For in the Caribbean sea when a storm brings clouds of black
They say the Hunter rises from the waves on deck stands one eyed Jack
They say this ghost ship then attacks beneath the lightening of a storm
Frightening is the tale told by the few that made it home
What became of 1 eyed Jack would remain a mystery
But the truth is out there somewhere in the Caribbean sea
© Dean Cooper Elston
Wednesday 3rd December 2008 - Sunday 15th March 2009
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