Jessica Delfino has a show on 03/21/2013 at 06:00 PM @ Klimat Lounge in NY, NY http://lnk.ms/f1Wzt #concert
Nov 9 @ Ace Hotel: Ben Lerman, Key of Awesome's Mark Douglas, Carolyn Castiglia + more! http://lnk.ms/dMBVK
Added a new video: "I'm Italian (I'll Pay You For Sex In Food)" http://lnk.ms/dGtds #video
CMJ UCB EAST 7 PM TONIGHT it's gonna be fun, that is, if you like the best comedy musicians in NYC. Otherwise, you might not like it.
Jessica Delfino has a show on 10/18/2012 at 06:30 PM @ The Upright... in New York, NY http://lnk.ms/dGMbn #concert
GeneralSandwiches. Singing songs about sandwiches. Songs. Comedy. Instruments. Running away from my problems. Tiny keyboards. Artsy stuff. Drawing pictures. Making music. People like me. Viewers like you.
MusicYou know, mostly my pals. The Pizzas, Led Zeppelin, Heart, Hunted Posse, Sweet D, Soce The Elemental Wizard, Negativland, Nachi, Schaffer The Dark Lord, The Dresden Dolls, Nellie McKay, Donovan, ELO, John Ewbank, A Brief View of The Hudson, Shanimal, Jollyship The Whiz-Bang, Dan Fishback, Dame Darcy & Death By Doll, The Fabulous Entourage, David Goo, Left With Pictures, your band which I randomly heard at a show in a basement.
http://http%3a%2f%2fwww.atom.com%2ffunny_videos%2f...source: AtomFilms FShare
This is by Elijah Atkins, a classic Delfino hit.
TelevisionI am too busy working on my famous sandwich songs to watch much TV. Wonder Showzen, Mr. Show, Quantum Leap, Electra Elf & Fluffer, Black Adder, Mr. Wizard, MacGyver, Art or Something Like It, MNN, some channel 13 shows, whatever you like. I liked Lucky Louie, too, you executive fucks. Bring it back!
Oh yeah, and any show with ME on it!!
BooksShout out to Bill Maher! He writes some decent books. One more to my main man Steve King! Jonathan Ames and Mike Albo can do no wrong. Dame Darcy's Meatcake comics - not a book but still tremendous literature that all children should be forced to read at gunpoint. Lisa Crystal Carver -the Judy Blume of my generation. Morgan Spurlock ain't bad! But of course I dig Raymond Carver, Milan Kundera and Kurt Vonnegut.
- Jun 12, 2009 6:12 PM Jessica Delfino SHOWS TONITE, FRIDAY JUNE 12
- May 12, 2009 5:49 PM SHOWS MAY 12 and 13 -- AND COMING TO UK JULY 15!!!
- Nov 18, 2008 2:08 PM Delfino’s Diatribe Fun List -- Thanksgiving Edition
- Nov 2, 2008 2:47 PM Going Back Into Time With Jessica Delfino
- Sep 22, 2008 7:10 AM Naughty Nautical Nite Updates for October 08
6 songs • 9/28/2009
- Play Next
- Add to queue
- Play Next
- Add to queue
- Play Next
- Add to queue
- Play Next
- Add to queue
- Play Next
- Add to queue
About me:WINNER! Best Musical Act --Emerging Comics of New York (ECNY) Award!
WINNER! Best Potty-Mouthed, Guitar-Slinging Comedian --The Village Voice!
WINNER! Best Unsigned Act of the Week --High Times!
WINNER! USA Weekly News 100 Star Award!
WINNER! "Best Press Release Ever", Gawker.com
FINALIST! "Make Us Laugh" competition, ABC's Good Morning America
FINALIST! "Andy Kaufman Awards" competition, NYC
Hi. My name is Jessica Delfino. I sing and play ribald raucous songs on (mostly) my guitar but I also rock the eff out of the flying V ukelele (the "V-kelele") and the rape whistle, autoharp, Q-chord, glockenspiel, tiny keyboard, and what have you. I also tell dirty jokes, make videos and short films, write sordid tales, draw drawings, tour and otherwise entertain the populous. But I'm not describing it right -- come see for yourself what I do.
You can read the extended BIO here:
Email jessdelfino at yahoo dot com to receive Jessica's monthly email newsletter, "The Monthly Visitor" for updates, show dates and breaking news.
Jessica on TWITTER
JESSICA DELFINO one of 50 most fashionable New Yorkers!
MICHAEL MUSTO of the VILLAGE VOICE likes I WANNA BE FAMOUS cd!
WED, NOV 13: SKITS'N'TITS
308 Bowery @ 1st St., NY, NY
The most fun you can legally have in 48 states and Puerto Rico. Don't be an idiot and miss this show. Skits? Tits? Comedy? Music? Cheap beer? Sexy audience? Awesome give aways? Dance party late into the wheee! hours? Yep, we got alllll that!
Doors at 9:30, show starts at 10. Be on time or stand in the back!
$8 at the door
VISIT ..www.jessicadelfino.com or www.jessydelfino.blogspot.com (right side column and scroll down) to see all MAY upcoming shows + events.
*JOIN THE SONG OF THE MONTH CLUB!* Free with any CD purchase or optional donation of any size to the paypal account at jess delfino at yahoo dot com. Get free mp3s sent to your inbox, show discounts and other perks. Email jess delfino at yahoo dot com, subject: SONG OF THE MONTH.
MORE ABOUT SONG OF THE MONTH:
Every Monday night you can hear a new song at NYC Talent Show. Watch the show live at 308 Bowery, every Monday at 10:30 PM, or you can watch it online at www.nyctalentshow.com. If you LIKE the song, let me know on my Facebook page! At the end of the month, the winning song will get sent to your inbox as an mp3. EASY! Hear my new songs before anyone else. Be in a club. Win * Win.
Jessica Delfino on Superdeluxe's THIS IS NEWS
You can now purchase I WANNA BE FAMOUS, a beautiful double disc set with a full-color poster on www.amazon.com or iTunes! This collector's CD features the Youtube hits, "My Pu$$y Is Magic" and "I Wanna Be Famous", "The Rape Whistle Song (Don't Rape Me)" and a dozen other solid gold hits. $13 includes shipping. Get yours before they are gone.
DIRTY FOLK ROCK CDs cost $10, shipping included, $12 UK, shipping included. To purchase Dirty Folk Rock, please send $10 to paypal, jess delfino at yahoo dot com. "I WANNA BE FAMOUS" was mentioned in NY Times' Urban Eye and featured and praised on the front page of the comedy section in both TIME OUT NY and TIME OUT LONDON!! See that? The music brings cities together with their common love of ribald humorous music and jokes.
Visit JESSICA DELFINO'S long-time blog, once upon a time hailed by Wil Wheaton: www.jessydelfino.blogspot.com
Naughty Nautical Night was a show at NYC's Slipper Room co-hosted with Dame Darcy. The show is defunct, but you can own your very own DVD of JD & DD highlights from the show by sending $8 to email@example.com via paypal.com. Don't forget to add your address! You'd be surprised how many people forget.
Hosted by Jessica Delfino & Dame Darcy, this nautical themed cabaret / variety type show and all night party was packed every month with terrific acts and lots of sailor-y goodness. See for yourself -- get the DVD.
Here's a video segment from "What Would Jesus Buy?" produced by "Super Size Me"'s Morgan Spurlock. WGN morning news show featured a brief clip of one of the songs written by Jessica Delfino in the caroling scene. The song they used here isn't a favorite, it's no "Walmart You A Macy's Christmas (& A K-Mart New Year") but it's still pretty exciting!
I always love performing in the UK! Highlights of past UK tours have included Latitude Festival, Reading & Leeds, a return to London's Soho Theatre and a premiere performance at The Comedy Store, Cest Duckie, Edinburgh Festival, Galway's Roisin Dubh and more. I hope to be touring the UK again next summer / fall 2011. Check back here for more details!
NEW!Jessica Delfino's hand made MERCH! "My Sandwich Is Magic" Undies! $10. (Replace sandwich with the part of a woman's body that no one is allowed to say) Email firstname.lastname@example.org or click HERE for images, or Paypal $10 & your size and address to jessdelfino@yahoo for yours today. Don't wait till tomorrow. The world could blow up. It might be nice to get blown up wearing knickers that say something.
You are visitor number:
DID YOU KNOW? Jessica Delfino also has a slew of all-ages songs which she performs at all-ages events. See the magical Q-chord in action! Hear about missing unicorns and riding bikes! Email email@example.com to inquire. If you aren't into happy go-lucky ditties, that's cool -- Jessica also sings lots of songs for ADULTS ONLY. Wanna hear some? Visit:
Here's another sandwich-y link:
Visit Jessica Delfino's blog to see what is going on with this magical sandwich:
Keep the memories alive forever -- buy this CD!
Credit cards accepted here, and by here, it's actually here: www.paypal.com
and also at www.amazon.com. These songs make great wedding and funeral themes because they celebrate LIFE.
If you don't want to use a credit card, email firstname.lastname@example.org for other options, of which there are plenty, and by plenty, there are about 3.
|Get Jessica Delfino's CD here!|
"We were immediately stuck to our seats stunned and smiling as Jessica Delfino engaged us in tune after tune referencing her, and others, vagina(s)...She is funny. And smart." -- Thurston Moore & Byron Coley, Arthur Magazine
"Comedic Discovery of the Month" --Comedy Central
"High Times Unsigned Band of the Week" --High Times
" * * * 1/2 [out of 4]" --Jane Magazine
"Fetchingly filthy. . . . Some of the most nasty, offensive, degrading and genius comedy you'll see all year." --New York Blade
"Best Potty-Mouthed, Guitar-Slinging Comedian" -- Best Of 2005 , The Village Voice
"The Lower East Side's folkie queen of obscene" --The Village Voice
"Jessica Delfino is a delightful young lady who likes to sing whimsical songs about her vag. She's sassy!" -- VICE Magazine
"Let me be absolutely clear about this, without any exaggeration: If you had to pay one live human baby in exchange for a ticket to her show, it would be worth it. More than worth it. . . . The songs are written and performed by Jessica and are hilarious. They're so funny that no word exists to describe them." --The Triangle, The Student Newspaper at Drexel University, Philadelphia
"She's a brilliant writer." --Wil Wheaton, Wil Wheaton dot Net
"Jessica Delfino is a comedian-songwriter who can warble with the earnestness of a folksinger while elucidating the finer points of oral sex. A cross between Redd Foxx and Jewel, Delfino sincerely strums her guitar in time to funny, often dirty lyrics with a well-practiced deadpan." --The Onion A.V. Club
"Hilariously ribald." -- BackStage.com
"Legendary" --The L Magazine
"Jessica Delfino has sang, danced, and comedianed her way to LES notoriety--some feat . . . . Plan to squirm, laugh and perhaps squirm again." --Time Out New York
"Adorably twisted. . . . Alternately sexy and hilarious. . . . Delfino captures such painful truth [that] you can’t help but simultaneously laugh and sigh." - Hellohilarious.com
"Absurdly hysterical" --The Portland [Maine] Phoenix
"Jessica is not the only the guitar welding comedian, but she may be one of the most original and outrageous." --Kernan Andrews, Galway [Ireland] Advertiser
"[A] comedy rock star. . . brilliant comedian/musician Jessy Delfino." --ComedyCentral.com
"Jessica Delfino has one of the funniest rape bits I've ever heard...smart, socially aware comedy." --The Huffington Post
"I love her. And when I say love, I don't mean in a stalking-creepy way, I just find her hilariously funny." --vox.com
"Stellar" -- NY Times
"Witty...as subversive as it gets" -- Backstage
"Critics' Choice...Supremely witty...smart and edgy...we've been playing this quirky New York songsters album 'I Wanna Be Famous' all week and can't wait to see 'My Pussy Is Magic' and "Only A Stranger's Cock' live. Naughty but nice." -- Time Out London
"The attractive and ballsy female comedian who grabbed the audience's attention from her entrance, Delfino has a way of making you hang on her every word...She turns the taboo into feminine and empowering subject matter." --The Portland [Maine] Phoenix
"A stirring show of ribald folk songs. There's more to this seriously talented comic songwriter than filthy jokes...a tough show to top" -- London METRO
"Our Pick -- best known for funny musical numbers and a video that was provocative enough to be taken off YouTube" -- The Washington Post
"One of the top acts to catch . . . . Delfino is a very talented musician with excellent comic timing." --FringeGuru (UK) (Review of Latitude Festival performance) "One US comedienne who knew how to keep a tent full of grubby individuals entertained: Jessica Delfino’s sickly-sweet psycho-bitch persona was a treat, and she even managed the rare feat of singing comedy songs that were actually funny. Expect to hear a lot more from her." -- drownedinsound.com "Dirty but clever, shocking but sweet, sassy New Yorker Delfino dances a very funny line between girly and filthy...her deadpan style lets her away with murder" -- The List, Edinburgh, Scotland "Who's hot and who's not in comedy -- Comedy songs: It's not just Flight of the Conchords: currently we've also got Jessica Delfino...pitching [her] most outlandish material against twee folk or cheery pop just seems to double the funny." -- The Guardian, London "Top 5 Free Fringe Show To See" -- The List "Delfino is a very talented musician with excellent comic timing...you sense she's gonna get her wish to be famous granted." -- Fringe Guru "Jessica Delfino is destined for fame" -- Londonisfunny.com "One of the strangest and best things you'll see all year" -- Time Out London
"The most artistically provocative show at the 2009 Edinburrgh Fringe Fest. . . . Jessica will no doubt soon be a household name. . . . Jessica is an absolute stunner." --USA Weekly News
"Filthy folk provides a soundtrack to our increasingly porny world...among the best acts is Jessica Delfino, the "Lower East Side Folkie Queen of Obscene". -- Penthouse Magazine
"[one of] 50 most stylish New Yorkers" -- Time Out NY "There are many words you could use to describe Jessica Delfino; artist, musician, comedian, writer and fashionista. And let's not forget this is the Jessica Delfino who beat out Flight of the Conchords for 'Best Musical Act' at the 2005 ECNY Awards." -–ComedyNews.org
"At least there was one US comedienne who knew how to keep a tent full of grubby individuals entertained: Jessica Delfino’s sickly-sweet psycho-bitch persona was a treat, and she even managed the rare feat of singing comedy songs that were actually funny. Expect to hear a lot more from her." -- DrownedInSound.com
"Jessica Delfino is famous. One million views on YouTube, numerous television writing gigs, and world touring as a charming, satirical, holy-shit-she-also-has-a-flying-V-ukulele singer/songwriter is famous." -- RCRDLBL.com
NOTE: Most of the photos on this page were taken by JuliaNewman.com, Alex M. Smith, Crystal Selbee and other talented people. The pretty pink head shot was taken by Doug Jaeger.
Don't be afraid of your sandwich! It has magical powers beyond belief! Use those powers!
THIS CLIP is from a trip to IRELAND, featuring a song on the rape whistle:
"What About Blowjobs?", asks Reggie Watts (I play the lady alien in this video):
The NY International Children's Film Festival screened the first official US festival premiere of my song, "I Wanna Be Famous", animated by Nick Fox-Gieg, seen by over a million viewers now on the wide web world. Thanks for watching!
Here are some songs from my 2nd CD, "I Wanna Be Famous" on line for you to hear (including the awesome Youtube "Magic" hit). You can also purchase these songs (including Magic!) on iTunes. I hope you love them as much as I loved making them...
It's Not Right
Moonshine Shorey and Jessica Delfino in defunct female-fronted DEVO cover band DEVA's video, "It's Not Right!"
Who I'd like to meet:Other people who sing, joke and talk about things that scare people. Multi-instrumentalists. The people who control the weather. People who are out of control. Someone who can turn my grey skies blue, my yellow festering problems into bright pink globules, my old, ugly purple pants into sassy, fashionable neon green cut offs.
Men who like to boogie with Aunt Flo:
- Status: Single
- Here for: Friends
- Height: 5' 9"
- Zodiac Sign: Gemini